OK. I just got back from seeing Taking Pelham 123. I don't understand why movies have to have such language. It could have been much worse, but GAH! Anyway, I have a stinkin' sinus infection and was trying to do something tonight that would make me feel better. I will inevitably be made fun of for going out tonight somehow, some way. You just wait and see. I layed around the house all day yesterday and slept when I wasn't watching TV. I NEVER do that! I always feel like there's something to be done. I got up today after going to bed extremely too late (early) last night (this morning). I did go to the doc and got shot and some antibiotics. They pretty much knocked me out today. I was freezing. In the dead of summer? I'm sick if I'm freezing in the summer. I was so tired, so I got back in bed under every cover that was on my bed and tried to get warm. I finally fell asleep and woke up sweating. NOT fun. I must have had a fever and have felt better since then. I really don't know why I'm sharing all this. I just felt like blogging. I'll be better soon. It's 11:35 and I'm incredibly sleepy. I'll be gone soon.
On a lighter note, a MUCH lighter note, I participated in the Emmaus Walk a couple of weeks ago. It was amazing. The first couple of days, I honestly wondered why I was there. I wondered if I was heartless because I was the only one that didn't cry. God showed me a lot on that journey and I would encourage anyone and everyone to go if you ever get a chance. God has a way of working out timing so that it's perfect. It was perfect timing for me. I kept waiting for God to reveal this huge thing to me, but that wasn't the way it worked. Sure, it was wonderful to be there and to hear people's stories and how God was so alive in their lives, but why was I there? What was the purpose? Pieces came together and by Sunday afternoon, I had cried all day. Sunday was for me. Thursday through Saturday were for me, but Sunday was the day. Actually, halt. Back up. Saturday night was when the tears began to flow. Tears of joy, not tears of sadness, but an amazing, overwhelming feeling of love that I had never realized before was so present, then it snowballed from there. In particular, a lady spoke of her job situation. She had a very prestigious job, but she and her boss didn't get along. She had to travel with him a lot. She was afraid of him. He was not a Christian. She prayed for him and prayed for a way to reach out to him. They were off somewhere and he had to get back home quickly. He had her book the flight home. She was stuck with him for 2 and 1/2 hours on that flight back home. She knew this was her opportunity to talk to him about God. She finally mustered up enough courage to talk this man she worked for but was so afraid of. Had to be very difficult, don't you think?! Soon after their talk, he fired her. Bottom line? Because she was a Christian and shared our God with him. How heartbreaking! Here's what got me... she found a new job. A huge paycut, a downscale from her previous job, but said she wouldn't trade it for the world. God blessed her socks off when He put her in her new position... a beauty consultant, which she never dreamed of being. If you're reading this, you most-likely know that I was up for tenure this year and got pink-slipped. God has something out there for me. I just have to find it. He will not forsake me. He will not let me go. I have to trust in him and not only believe IN Him, but believe Him period. It's hard. It's REALLY hard. I have no idea where I'll be in the Fall. Music jobs are SO hard to find. How else would I have ended up 100 miles away from home? From all I had ever known? I am extremely blessed at my church job, FUMC, Russellville and it breaks my heart every time I think I might have to leave there soon. I don't think I've EVER been so loved by a church!!! I bought a house last summer at that weighs heavy as well. I do know that if God wants me in Russellville, that I'll still be here. If not, I won't. I know there's something out there. I'll just go ahead and say that it might not be teaching. It may be something totally different, but God knows what He's doing and I should remind myself that every second of the day.
My Emmaus Walk taught me other things, too. Some other things are too personal to share with the blogging world, but amazing? Yes! You betcha! 1 John 4:8 rang in my ears that weekend. I had a friend tell me "I don't think I'm spiritual enough to go." You do not HAVE to be "spiritual enough" or "religious enough" or whatever enough to go to Emmaus!!! If you have the opportunity or a nudge in your heart to go, do it. God will send you when it's YOUR time to go. I was asked to go forever at my previous church, but the timing wasn't right. There are SEVERAL reasons I KNOW it was my time. I didn't know it, but God did.
So, I guess this blog was mostly about Emmaus. It has nothing to do with my RAI Therapy (which I'm feeling MUCH better BTW!), but I don't know how to go another blog within my blog. Didn't want to take the time to figure it out, but if you want to teach me, I'm all ears. Or, eyes on the internet. :)
I hope God is blessing you. I have been blessed and I need to wake up and smell the coffee. I'll find a job. One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 3:5-6. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understandings. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path." Pretty strong verses there!
Good night!
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
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